Now what?

Exact question I’ll ask myself. What do I want in my life? It’s always the same. I want something real bad, get it, only to have a new request, and probably just in the form of superficial gratification. Greed.

It’s a matter of perspective. Look at the peasants in China. They’re poor but you see them laughing all right, nary a worry of what’s in hold for them tomorrow. Many are not supposedly as “blessed” as I am. I don’t have monetary woes, look decent, am smart [fcking lazy though], get almost anything I want, yet this feeling of emptiness threatens to engulf me all the time. A life is a cruel thing. It’s granted to you regardless of choice and it unravels randomly with hardly anything meaningful. For many, it’s filled with hardships, disappointment and tears.

I’ve to put an end to this obnoxious habit of mine. I cannot keep demanding for everything and satiate my most superficial and some might say, silly, of needs. I need a purpose. One that makes the rest of life easier to transverse, without the sickening feeling that I’m getting nothing done and just being another being on this overcrowded planet till the day I die.

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~ by gpigz09 on November 19, 2010.

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